I don’t think I’ve ever actually done all 30 days of gratitude, which is a testament to my powers of self-sabotage. Deadlines for external forces (work, other people, creative collaborations, etc.) are already challenging to me, and often the only way I’m able to get through the various challenges — almost all of which are born of the previously mentioned powers of self-sabotage — is through the desire not to let other people down. I seem to have no problem disappointing myself, but to disappoint others? That’s not to say that: 1) I never disappoint others; 2) the desire not to disappoint others is always enough to light the fire of perseverance; or 3) that I always disappoint myself. Awareness of process is all that’s happening here.
At any rate. I thought I’d go ahead and jump on the 30 Days of Gratitude train, and try a weekly digest format as a means of self-encouragement.
DAY ONE: Fri, Nov. 1st. I am grateful for the one-hour white noise track that I play on loop in my apartment much of the time that I am home. Living in an apartment building can mean thin walls and hearing too much of neighbors’ goings-on. Add to that the occasional mouth-sounds made by a cat (licking, loud smacking when eating, more licking) and the mental respite provided by an ongoing white noise soundtrack is VERY helpful. Calming, helps me focus (when I can get around to working on something), and disarms the kneejerk reaction to noise sensitivity.
DAY TWO: Sat, Nov. 2nd. I am grateful to have a car that can take me all over. Today’s events took me from home (Pomona) to North Hollywood to Toluca Lake to CSULA (East LA) back to home. I would have been on public transit for over two hours just to get from my house to NoHo. The car cuts that time by at least half.
DAY THREE: Sun, Nov. 3rd. I am grateful to be connected to so many artistic communities. To be able to be around art and artists on a weekly, if not daily, basis is a very lucky and nourishing thing. I saw theatre four times this week and worked on scenes for more than one project, and read plays, and talked to strangers about creativity and critical thinking, and all of that is pretty magical.